Hands off the birth

Providers always feel like they need to do something. Their hands need to be busy. Including hands on or inside the vagina when it’s time to push. Sometimes the woman or birthing person may need assistance on knowing where and how to push if they have an epidural. A hands on birth can make sense in this instance. But I have witnessed plenty of women feel the pressure of a contraction (not the pain) with an epidural and they can instinctively push with it.

If you are doing an undisturbed (unmedicated) birth, you will feel these urges to push and will definitely not need assistance.

But still, providers feel the need to assist. I get the vibe that to them, it’s the only way a baby can be born. This is incorrect. They are actually contributing to tearing and they truly believe they aren't. They stick their hands into the same space a baby needs to exit out of while they prefer for you to have your knees wide open, perineum stretched to max capacity. What happens when you run out of space because you’re already stretched at max capacity before the baby is born? The body will tear to accommodate.

What happens when your coaching is “PUSH, PUSH, PUSH, PUSH, PUSH, HARDER, HARDER, HARDER, HARDER, MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE, MORE”? You quickly eject your baby out without giving your vagina time to slowly stretch and acclimate to the sensations.

Tearing is okay, it happens and honestly you don’t feel it as it happens. But so many people have this fear of it happening to begin with. Hands off the birth and gentle coaching are two ways to reduce or prevent tearing.